urged

decided that this Bowie thing is a mixture of the realisation that life is limited {life as we know it at least...} so maybe it's time to go live it, the notion that he was a decent guy with a kind heart {from what i keep reading... the testimonies of folks he helped along the way, who knew him as a good man, keep coming up, proving that  being a genius rock god doesn't have to be synonymous to being an ass hole...}, and he lived outside that bleeding box. he didn't let himself be restricted by what was right or proper or acceptable, or commercially sensible, he did what he felt needed to be done, made, created. he WAS... he still is...

not that he's the only one, or more super special than others - John Lennon had that same urge, as did Janis Joplin, and Johnny Cash, and Virginia Woolf, and Vincent van Gogh and Rudolf Steiner... all slightly ahead of their times, following their passion and adding something great to the world... not that they were always wonderful people to be around, or saints, only ever doing the right thing {a friend of mine was quick to point out some very questionable sides to David Bowie, for instance}, in no way, but they felt they had little choice but to BE, to DO, to FEEL, to LIVE...

i guess that's what i feel inspired by, that's what i need to unlock in myself - my urge, my authentic self... i have an inkling as to where it lives... now to make it feel safe to come out...