neighbourhood watching

from their balcony they can see into the gardens of about 8 houses. it's quite a diverse area, here, though mostly the houses are private and well kempt, and it's quiet here too, with the motorway 1 kilometer away and audible, as a constant low hum in the background. their view overall is trees, huge ones, making it almost look like they live in the country...

just now they hung out a load of washing on the over-the-door rack and the standing one, as it's a lovely, sunny day, and glanced at the gardens in their view. the nearest is right underneath, at the back of the building, stretching along the ground floor apartment, and it's huge. the people living there have a boy with autism and he loves using his trampoline, and the waterway toy that's similar to the one their kids once also had... the mum is less-abled and loves to potter around, tinkering with the many potted plants she grows there, which in the summer looked beautiful... 

next up there's a garden which they have so far never seen anybody sit in, although it's very pretty and well maintained. there's a gazebo which had the roof replaced last summer by a very attractive carpenter {yay for that view...} and there's some mature trees that attract birds and butterflies, and shrubs that give lovely colour and flowers. the next garden is much better used - the people there enjoy entertaining, and have done this throughout last summer. this garden is more sparse, mostly filled with garden furniture rather than plants, and it's funny to hear them chat away {an older couple who look like they might be actively involved in the village - my assumption this} about stuff {they can't actually hear what is said, there might be bickering going on about each other or their kids, who knows?!}.

then there's the Young Couple With 2 Kids, who look like they're professional, and they have a lovely ginger retriever that bundles about in the small space they have left after creating an extension. she likes to sit on the functional bench that doubles as a storage area, looking at her phone while the toddler plays and jabbers away at her mum. husband is rarely there, and when he is, he chats on his phone, pacing and gesticulating... their neighbours are about to move, and the people next to them have last week added an Outdoor Entertaining Shed, which looks very new and very flashy. they expect there will be many a bbq held this summer... 

the other gardens are less visible, only the trees that poke out give them a glimpse into the lives lived. right across from the older couple is an extended Moroccan family, with grandparents, a younger couple and a few kids. there's also, on the paved space, about 58 potted plants, with peppers and other vegetables, bearing colourful fruits as the summer wears on. for now they've been stacked into a corner, awaiting warmer temperatures. they're also eagerly awaiting the return of the tropical paddling pool that was there, tempting in the sweltering heat of last year. the little kids playing sounds delightful...

so, on this lovely warm spring day, as they fuss about the right way for the clothes to catch the sun best, and the plants try their best to come back to life, life is pretty nice here...

illusions

one thing my friend Mo has a huge advantage on, is the time she puts into figuring out stuff and applying the things she finds along the way into her reality. {well, i probably have that time as well, i just chose to spend it differently...} and one of the things she has figured out ages ago, is something that has taken up until last week for me to click. finally. 

"One of the most important principles we teach in this work is how to create from the field instead of from matter. Think of the quantum field as an invisible field of frequency/energy that connects everything physical and material. It is this field of pure energy, which exists beyond our senses, that gives form to this 3D reality."

for years she's been trying to 'convince' me that the reality we live in isn't real. it's an illusion. it is whatever we believe it is... now, part of me understands this - i feel that i live in a different reality than my next door neighbour, who's a Jesus-obsessed, fearful woman, or my colleague T, who feels the work we do in the shop is pointless, since other supermarkets sell stuff much cheaper, and is now moving one to pastures new.

"We all possess a physical body in a physical universe that is made up of people, objects, and things. Because all of these things appear to occupy a particular space at a particular time, our senses fool us into the illusion of separation."

i can see that the notion that we all believe what we need to believe to live our lives the way we think we should in order to be happy - through centuries of conditioning - is true. i've seen it happen in front of me, that someone stops believing something and their lives literally change... it happens to me on a daily basis, that i catch myself thinking something, and it makes me feel bad, and then i let that thought go, and i feel okay and at peace again... did something in my Outer World change? no... my thoughts changed, where i focussed my energies.

"Since where we place our attention is where we place our energy, then in order for us to create from the field instead of from matter, we have to abandon—and thus remove—all of our attention from everything known that we associate with, in this physical world of matter, in space and time."

we all want to be happy. above all else. we want to have an easy life. we all have different ways to achieve this happiness. for some it's having a nice house, for others it's having tonnes of friends and fun experiences, for others still it's knowing that there's a holiday in the planning, or even that there is noting coming up in the break they have from work. or that their pensions are safe. or that their kids are okay. or that science has their backs. all of these things are outside of our control... 

"If you're no longer paying attention to anything in this 3D reality, it makes sense then that it no longer exists for you. This is exactly what is required to pass through the door to enter the quantum field—and that requires us to become no body, no one, no thing, no where, in no time."

the quote in between my text is from Dr. Joe Dispenza, a teacher/helper/researcher of the new spiritual development world, who tends to base his shared knowledge on scientific research, and it illustrates perfectly what my friend Mo has been trying to get across to me for years. we are nothing but Energy. you are, i am, my cats are, my kids are, my car is, my house is, money is, the trees in the woods where i feel happy are... 

this requires some serious letting go of notions. as Dispenza describes, it takes letting go of the attachment to Reality as we're told to believe it to be. an attachment to Reality as we're constantly reinforced to Believe Is Real, and anyone who thinks about this differently is {at the very least} a bit weird... and because we don't want to be excluded from Society, we need to shun anybody who thinks like that. we need to shun, ridicule, ostracize, distance ourselves from anyone who questions the way we see Reality. 

or not...

one of the fun things about Law of Attraction is that as soon as you let go of one way of believing, you will attract other people into your life - people who also have no truck with 'Reality' as we're forced to believe it to be... as one set of people falls away {cos they don't fit your life anymore, or you theirs} another set appears... and for a while it can feel quite nice to travel alone, not get distracted by the voices of those who doubt you, who doubt otherness. there's enough turmoil going on inside without the added distraction of outsiders doubt... {and the outside world is just a projection of your inner self, but that's another post all together...}

balcony bliss

this year is the first time i see the plants in the pots on my balcony awaken into spring. 

last year there weren't any, as i hadn't really gotten the place ready yet, and only after the boys made it cat-safe in April had i put thought into what could grow here, what would look pretty, and what could be eaten. i had sown seeds for tomatoes {hopeful...} and Zinnia, and a few pumpkins went into a pot, just to see what would happen and get some green going. i also found a Japanese maple that could work in a pot, and some Hydrangeas {hortensias in Dutch} and a ridiculously expensive small bamboo plant, and loads of different Fuchsias, as well as Geraniums passed on by my mum. 

by mid-summer it was looking glorious!! even the heatwave did it's worst without much in the way of casualties. well, one Fuchsia wasn't too happy and almost died, but that was really it. i was delighted... slightly disappointed by the yield of my tomato plant {three...}, and in giggles over the produce of the pumpkin - one whole tiny weenie one, the size of a cherry... i also tried my hand at Rucola {was okay} and Coriander {meh}, so i guess i'm having to rethink my edibles. 

but the first inklings of a whole new life-cycle is already making itself known. my Hydrangeas are sprouting leaves, the maple is awakening, as is the small beech tree, and the bamboo is having tonnes of new shoots!! some plants that i hadn't cleared up yet {i'm a very lazy gardener} are showing signs of life {yay!!} and my hands are getting quite itchy. 

i'll be looking into herbs to grow, soon, and some things i can eat, so ideas are very welcome!! 

meanwhile, this is last year's heaven:

on dreams and ponder

since i want to move away from labels - and both 'Bohemian' and 'Buddhist' are that - about my identity, i decided to change the name, and url, of this blog. i dream and i ponder, on life and all it's weird, amazing facets. 

i'm neither a Buddhist, nor am i very Bohemian. i try to be the latter, and i feel i achieve this by being Me as much as i can. for me that entails having my own style, my own values, my own belief system {based in a spiritual, love-steeped, Universe-inspired way of thinking} that seems to clash wildly with how society wants people to be. and that's fine. i just don't really want to be part of it, any more than i have to... 

this past year has shown me how far removed i feel from 'Society' and how i wish to be part of a community of people who live in love and abundance and joy, and leave my fear-based thinking behind, however hard that is at times... 

so i dream of the life i want, and i ponder on the obstacles on my path, then let them go... life's too short for labels

shopping list

wishlist  shopping list for the Universe:

i am happy and grateful, now that i

own a red campervan
♥    

have unlimited funds

(as money flows to me easily and effortlessly)
♥
know a few lovely friends
♥

have plentiful visits to Sweden, Norway, 

Germany, Finland...
♥
speak German fluently
and Spanish well enough
♥
can play the ukelele
♥
live nearer the woods
♥
have a dog
♥
know how to do woodwork
♥
am healthy and so are my kids
♥

fanfared

as always, i'm pretty late to the party, when it comes to certain music, especially Balkan brass band folk... well, mostly i'm not even at the party, i liked Beirut a lot in the mid-2000's and that was the extent of my knowledge with regards to eastern European/Balkan folk music. and boy did i miss out on a lot!

thanks to the French radio station that i can receive with my tv/internet/phone subscription {FiP, in case you're interested, they can be found on internet as a plug-in thingy as well} which plays just about anything from Radiohead and Led Zeppelin to Classical music and light jazz, via hiphop and R&B, with detours to one-hit wonders, big-band and folk, with no real indication of what will follow, and that usually suits me nicely, i'm introduced to all kinds of brilliant. one of them was this song, by the Fanfare Ciocãrlia, which had me grab my phone to Shazam it immediately. the result took me to their page on Spotify, and there i learnt that they are a 12-piece band, based in Romania and have been around since my second son was born - 1996... well, actually they've been around for many more years, but they were 'discovered' by a German sound engineer then, who was very impressed by their energy and unique take on the music they grew up around, got them to apply for passports and booked a tour though Europe, and the rest was history.

apparently they were loved by the dance/rave scene in the early 2000's, something that i'm finding hard to get, on one hand, but on the other, their high energy, happy music would appeal to a crowd that's into dance and are typically interested in exploring different, new sounds. their music was also used in one of the Borat films {...}

when The Great Pottery Throw Down {a 'lose one contestant every week' style program based around pottery} was still shown on the BBC, i loved the music used, which was a mixture of 60's brit-rock {The Who, Small Faces, the Kinks} and some brass band, and to me it added to the delight that this program was {it's still on, just on a channel that i sadly can't watch}. as opposed to any other contestant show, it will regularly make me feel exuberant with joy and completely inspired to take up pottery again.... there's obviously a huge difference between brass bands from the Balkan and Yorkshire, but the feeling it evokes is oddly similar. the film Brassed Off {underrated, with a glaring cast, like Ewan McGregor and that bloke that went on to play a butler in Downton Abbey}, from 1996, shows how evocative the music can be - either raising spirits or emphasizing depth. 

so, another treasure to unwrap for me... and see if i can find that film somewhere... 

only the lonely

yesterday i had a long, lovely afternoon with my oldest friend Mo. we go back as long as i live {she's 2 months my senior} as our mothers were friends {even though there's about 20 years difference between them} and we kind of had no choice but to grow up together. this happened until we hit teenage - she hit teenage very hard, i kind of slinked into the background for a good few years - and we found each other again when i lived in England and she'd became a mum and 'settled down' in the village. we weren't close though. we were on different plains in life, and not until i came back to NL did we find common ground in the path to spiritual and intuitive development we had both started walking.

we couldn't be more different. she's colourful, extravert, loud, spontaneous, easy-going, inviting, warm, comes from a big family, is the youngest of 5... i'm reserved, careful, quiet, introvert, a closed book until i feel i can trust you, my family is small, and i'm the oldest of 2... her approach to the spiritual & intuitive is different to mine, but still, we complement each other quite well. she's the Yin to my Yang {or the other way around...}

the other day i mentioned that i'm delving deeper into the things i once learnt about Celtic paganism and Witchcraft. something that has been in my life at least since i moved to England, but also before that, there were always people who knew about herbs, and Celtic arts and crafts, and Tarot cards, using a pendulum, and that There Was More Between Heaven And Earth {one of my aunts springs to mind, who was probably more knowledgable about witchcraft than i realised back then} and it always spoke to me on a level i couldn't explain. but because i didn't have the Gift {a 'natural' ability to See things, to Know things that i couldn't technically Know} i decided it wasn't for me. Mo has it - she Sees and Knows and Communicates - and she reckons we all do, but have buried it underneath the crap we have learnt since we were born. i just forgot about this side of my intuitive development. but i mentioned to her that i'm reading about it, and figuring out how i can use it more in my life, be more in tune with my nature, and Nature itself. and - she texted me back straightaway - so is she... 

so yesterday, when we finally managed to find a day where we could get together, we talked about this, and the situation in the world, and how far removed we feel - further and further - from the society around us. how difficult it feels to feel a connection between people around us {apart from our kids}, while knowing it doesn't matter. we might feel 'lonely' at times, but we're not alone... if nobody else, we have each other...